I walked over to see a guy starting a fire in a pile of bathroom sink basins cabinets. "What's that?" I said. "You've heard of the 'bonfire of the vanities?" he queried. ... "People who curse more have higher IQs," I read from the news feed. I looked at my wife and said, "Well you have a high IQ so I guess that explains it." ... It turns out the Tooth Fairy is using crypto currencies to reward kids. The youngsters are left with a computer transaction that leaves them wondering to convert bitcoins to dollars ... A little-known fact about the aftermath of the New England Patriots-Minnesota Viking football game—after the game, New England Patriot quarterback Tom Brady astonished the TV audience by taking a handful of cod, a few beans and a bag of bagels and feeding the crowd at Foxboro stadium. ... With President Trump and rapper Jay-Z exchanging attacks, I think the only way to solve this is through a rap competition. If Trump wins, he can declare himself FROTUS—First Rapper of the United States. "My name is Donald and I cut taxes" ... As the show "The Walking Dead" ages, producers are being forced to consider devices to assist Zombies in walking, including the new mobility device, the Zombie scooter, being marketed under the "Zooter" brand ... The prediction made by Punxsutawney Phil in his annual Groundhog's Day excursion is unclear. Whether he saw his shadow or not, he shook his head sadly and went back into his hole. At last report, he was in his hole repeatedly watching the movie, "Groundhog's Day", and sobbing uncontrollably.
Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 30 seconds
RANDOM THOUGHTS: JAY-Z Featured
A poster for United Airlines at Newark Airport promotes the amenities available to fliers. The sign informs coach passengers, "You have seats with cushions." ... There was smoke coming from down the street.
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