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RANDOM THOUGHTS: I THINK I'VE REACHED THE AGE

I think I've reached the age where my learning curve is more of a downward spiral. But I've also achieved a happy medium: my narcolepsy balances out my ADD. ...

Actor David Hasselhoff, who was rushed to the hospital again this week for alcohol poisoning, plans to capitalize on his problems in a new series called “Booze Watch”. In the first episode, Hasselhoff rolls drunkenly around the floor while the supporting cast urges him not to go near the water. In previews for the next version, a swimmer's family begs the star not to perform mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. He's also going to appear on the reality show, "Drying Out with the Stars". ... The Sage Summit customer conference in November features a special event at the Georgia Aquarium, which houses the world’s largest collection of catfish, crawdads and snapping turtles. ... When I hear a company has been positioned in a Gartner quadrant I immediately hear “Captain Kirk, the Romulans have entered the upper right hand quadrant of the Gartner quadrant.” “What do you recommend, Mr. Spock?" "Acquire them, Captain." ... While the diamond is the hardest substance known, the second hardest is dried bird crap that I've been trying to remove from the deck railing.

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