Conrad HiltonDo you know what to call a very amorous person suffering from a disease caused by antibiotic-resistant germs? An incurable romantic. ... There is a new gang terrorizing the country whose members operate in complete silence and worship Marcel Marceau. They are, of course, the Criminal Mimes. ... It is now illegal in Las Vegas for any casino not to have a Cirque de Soleil show. ... ... Actor Harrison Ford's emergency landing in his airplane drew praise for his skill as a pilot.

In later news, authorities say an aging and arthritic Chewbacca was in intensive care after receiving life-threatening injuries. Some confused bar patrons thought the news said former Toronto mayor Rob Ford had crash landed and they were wondering how the plane was able to get off the ground in the first place. ... Paris Hilton's brother, Conrad, just pleaded guilty to assaulting flight attendants. Let's at least, hope he doesn't crawl out of a limo wearing a kilt and no underwear. After smoking pot in the plane's toilet, Conrad called passengers "Peasants." The airlines liked the idea so much the term will no replace "coach." Conrad's behavior has him as the odd-son favorite for this year's "Rich Brat of the Year" award. ... No one really wants to know what Hilary Clinton said in her private email about Benghazi. They want to know what she said about Bill.  ... Someone asked me what I thought about Benghazi. I said I loved him in the TV show, "The Fugitive". ... Scientists who opened 170-year old bottles of beer discovered in a shipwreck said the liquid smelled "Gross". Even more gross was the smell after downing two six packs of them.

Last modified on Friday, 06 March 2015
Read 1881 times
Rate this item
(0 votes)
Bob Scott

Bob Scott has been informing and entertaining the mid-market financial software community with his email newsletters for 10 years. And he has been covering this market through print publications for 18 years, first as technology editor of Accounting Today and then as the Editor of Accounting Technology from 1997 through 2009. He has covered the traditional tax and accounting profession during the same time and continues to address that as executive editor of the Progressive Accountant.

Visit other PMG Sites:

Template Settings

Color

For each color, the params below will give default values
Tomato Green Blue Cyan Dark_Red Dark_Blue

Body

Background Color
Text Color

Header

Background Color

Footer

Select menu
Google Font
Body Font-size
Body Font-family
Direction
PMG360 is committed to protecting the privacy of the personal data we collect from our subscribers/agents/customers/exhibitors and sponsors. On May 25th, the European's GDPR policy will be enforced. Nothing is changing about your current settings or how your information is processed, however, we have made a few changes. We have updated our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy to make it easier for you to understand what information we collect, how and why we collect it.
Ok Decline