The Rally to Restore Honor was followed by the Rally to Restore Sanity. And now I am pleased to announce what you have all been waiting for, the Bob Scott Rally to Restore to Brevity. "I will defend your right to say whatever you want as long as you keep it short and then shut up." Next year, I am planning the Rally to Restore Rallies, for those who cannot get enough.
I had thought about a Rally to Restore Decency, but figured attendance would be light. Then I planned the Rally to Continue Indecency in which all sorts of drunken rowdiness would be featured, but backed off after getting a warning letter about competing with the National Football League. ... I'm already in the holiday mood. I'm anxiously awaiting the heartwarming episode of "Criminal Minds" being planned for the Christmas season entitled, "Who's Killing Santa's Elves?" in which actor Billy Bob Thornton further develops his role as a REALLY, bad, Santa. That's after the Thanksgiving Special, "You're a Dead Man, Charlie Brown," in which Lucy attacks the long-suffering Comic-book character with an ax.  And coming to market for Halloween is an update to the "Legend of Sleepy Hollow," which is being updated for adults so that instead of a being pursued by the Headless Horseman, Ichabod Crane has to deal with the Topless and Bottomless Horseman. ... I failed as a reporter in not mentioning earlier this summer's "World Testicle Cooking Championship" in the mountain town of Ozem, Serbia. To describe some of the coverage, "teams of chefs cook up bull, boar, camel, ostrich and even kangaroo testicles." You get the feeling there's not much going on in Serbia? There's a plan for a new chain that features the food served flambé, called "Great Balls of Fire." Last modified on Sunday, 16 June 2013
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