Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 43 seconds

RANDOM THOUGHTS: THE OPERA

The German Opera, "Der Freishutz", which I just performed, involves a guy who sells his soul to the devil and gets a bunch of magic bullets. It's like Faust with guns. It's perfect for the U.S market. Get the NRA to sponsor it, and then all you’d have to do to interest most people is get rid of the singing, the orchestra and German - but leave the guns. The libretto calls for a wild boar to wander across the set. It would do well in the South

… I have no real opinion about Barbara Murkowski, the Republican who won re-election as as a U.S. Senator via a write-in campaign. But doesn't this say something special about Alaska's educational system that so many people can spell her name? … Some guy is in trouble because he shot his TV because of Bristol Palin's performance on "Dancing with the Stars." I would have shot the TV just because it was tuned to "Dancing with the Stars."  ... The four most feared words on TV? "You are the father." ... Next week, this newsletter will be silent in order to let our readers participate in the annual running of the shoppers at Wal-Mart. Hopefully, the casuality rate will be lower. ...  Hewlett Packard has a new game, "Where's Leo?" If you can find CEO Leo Apotheker, who hasn't been seen in recent weeks, within a 100-mile radius of a California courthouse, you can serve him a summons to testify at a suite involving Oracle, and SAP, where he was formerly CEO. ... Many people are upset at the new pat down procedures being used by airport security, who can now pat down about any part of the body. Many women are saying, "So?  That's what most guys think they can do on a date." It brings a new meaning to the phrase, "America can't stand pat." Although there are objections to X-ray inspections, Repubicans, who want to replace TSA screeners with private workers, think these could be combined with medical screenings to save money under a new health plan.
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