Don RicklesI figured out how the dispute between GOP presidential contenders Donald Trump and Ted Cruz got started. Cruz was trying to tell an old joke with Trump in earshot. "Take my wife, please," the Ted cracked. "It looks like a few people already did," the Donald enjoined. Cruz then retorted that Trump's hair makes it look like his mother mated with a chia-pet.

Given the tone of the campaign, I have settled on a dark-horse candidate—Don Rickles. The 90-year old insult specialist should be able to sink to the level of debate. "Hey, Trump, I've seen better hair on a brillo pad. Cruz, you ever consider building a wall around Texas to keep you out of the United States? Bernie Sanders? He could be the first president to do a commercial for Depends. And Hillary, she's okay, but just don't email her any secrets."... The local facility, just down the road from my house, which provides water and sewer services offers a confined spaces training program. I decided to apply for a job. "What makes you think you are qualified for anything like this?" "Hey, I flew in a middle-seat in coach coast-to-coast last week. I figure I can do about anything in a tight space." ... New Orleans has an open-carry policy, that is you can have open alcoholic beverages anywhere. Wouldn't it be interesting to combine that in a city that has an open-carry gun policy? ... Listening to Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella talk about the use of video bots in electronic communications had me thinking about conversations about celebs in the future. "Have your bot call my bot?" And I can foresee hackers getting involved and we'll have crank calls—your drunken video Skyped to an old girlfriend gets sent to your boss. It could also lead to speeding up the dating scene when your online post is routed to potential suitors.... Saudi Arabia plans to fund construction of a bridge over the Red Sea between itself and Egypt. In a remake of "Exodus,", the Egyptian army is thwarted in overtaking the Hebrews when the later cause the draw bridge to rise, trapping their foes on the other side.

 

Last modified on Friday, 08 April 2016
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