Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 17 seconds

RANDOM THOUGHTS: HELLO KITTY

hello kittyWhen I got in the car I looked down at the brake and shouted. “You’re no good, You’re worthless. I don’t know why you exist.” My friend said, “Why are you yelling at the brake?.” “Well, it says depress the brake to start the car.” … Last week when I was in Manhattan, I saw two people in head to toe dress as big feet (as opposed to big foots?) outfits walking the street. It was a marketing pitch for a podiatrist.
I was just thankful they weren't working for a proctologist. New Yorkers, being resourceful as always, quickly requested the two help stomp out a nearby cockroach infestation.… New York is always different. Walking down 42nd Street I ran into Hello Kitty, Raggedy Ann, Minnie Mouse and Elmo. Apparently the annual convention of the National Society of Fictional Characters was being held. A sad note, however: reports are that Donald Duck was absent because he is undergoing anger management treatment. … Someone asked me if I was watching the National Basketball Association playoffs. “I don’t like pro basketball,” I said. “I like team sports.” But then pro basketball is such an important part of the spring and early summer ritual it's probably not appropriate to diss it. … A new word “Lohaned” is being considered for the 2014 dictionaries. It means to experience continuing failure without any apparent serious legal consequences. Alternatively, it means to ruin a promising career. … The debut of Iron Man 3 was nearly delayed when the title character experienced a near-fatal attack of rust.
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