Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 23 seconds
RANDOM THOUGHTS: MCCARTNEY, NIRVANA

However, he is a front runner to be spokesman for "The Biggest Loser" ... Since the Super Bowl is rapidly approaching, it's important to remember that sex, like football, is a game of inches. ... I don't see the big deal about the football player whose ailing girlfriend turned out to be imaginary. I once knew someone who had an imaginary girlfriend. Or was that a doll? ... I think one of my friends is low on modern culture. When I talked about pole dancing, he responded, "Oh they are such a lovely people." "How about lap dancing?" "Well, I think they are in trouble because reindeer are such an important part of their culture and global warming is causing all kinds of problems. ... Angry with his treatment by the Jets, it appears quarterback Tim Tebow has taken up voodoo. At least, it's reported there are a lot of dolls in his residence that resemble the team management. But a more reliable report say that the Jets have added an insurance rider that covers damage by fire and brimstone. ... As I examined the bill for our meal, my wife asked, "What's the tax?" "Oh, that's the amount that the government adds to sales to raise revenue." And don't call me, Shirley.
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