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RANDOM THOUGHTS: SMOKEY THE BEAR

Smokey the BearYou can't teach an old dog new tricks but you can teach him to confuse onlookers into thinking you have. … You can lead a horse to water but it takes a lot of effort to hold them under. …Noted a map that reports the richest person in each of the 50 United States. Washington of course, has Bill Gates with $80 billion. But sadly, there are three sates, Alaska North Dakota, and Maine, that have richest people worth less that a billion each. How would you like to show up at the club and someone asks your net worth and you have to reply in muffled tones “$700 million”? Let’s help these poor rich people out and get them over the top. Let’s make the poor rich richer. Sponsored by the Billionaire Boys’ Club.

… A news item today noted that Smokey the Bear has turned 70. Sadly, the furry public servant is showing signs of deterioration. In his last public appearance, he faced the camera and intoned, “Remember, only you can prevent, prevent, uh, rabbits. No, that’s not it. Prevent campers. Jeez. Let’s stamp out forests now, uh. Damn. Where’d I put my keys? What are we doing?” … Boeing and South African Airways have teamed up to make jet fuel from tobacco. You will now also be able to buy regular, extra long, menthol and high-test cigarettes. I suppose there’s no need to label with “May be hazardous to your health.” 

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