Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 28 seconds

RANDOM THOUGHTS: ROB FORD

Rob Ford, Toronto mayorThere has been a lot of news about a town worried about that a large, beached animal may explode. "You mean the dead blue whale in California?" I was asked. "No, Toronto mayor Rob Ford." ... Political advisors have determine the best way to keep Ford from embarrassing statements is to have rocker Ozzy Osbourne give him elocution lessons. That way Ford can continue make gaffs, but no one will understand him. ... It is widely believed by scientists, because they play such an important role in our society, if the Kardashians did not exist, we would have to invent them.

... My wife recent underwent a routine medical procedure. After it was over, I told her she is so easy going and relaxed when she's partly sedately. But I have to tell you—she just can't take a compliment. .... Anniversaries have items associated with them: metals such as silver and gold and items like pottery and candy. If the birthdays had an associated gift, the one for the 65th would be paperwork. ... I always enjoy feedback from our readers. One came through today with this subject " Drop dead...quit sending me your stupid spam...you imbeciles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" But there was no comment in the body of the email so I'm not sure what the exact message was. ... There's a recent report of maggots found the meat case of a San Francisco Whole Foods Store. What's wrong with that? Many of that chain's customers eat organic food. The store was also fined by the FDA for not showing maggots on the label as an ingredient. ... This just in: free market advocates are demand an end to taxes and regulations the board game, "Monopoly". Players would be able to establish their own charges for rents on properties with houses and hotels.

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