Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 26 seconds

RANDOM THOUGHTS: KISS AND ZOMBIES

Kiss Billboard Las VegasSomebody asked me what I thought of ISIS. "Isis? I love the way they look in the spring, especially the old-fashioned blue ones." ... An old joke has become reality: a Michigan funeral home is offering drive-through service. The bad news is for drivers who think they are in line for a fast-food restaurant. "I'll have a burger, fries and ... Oh my God! Grandma?"

... Among the rotating messages in Las Vegas on one LCD outdoor display (the modern term for billboard), is one that promises "Keep Zombies in Place with a Tiberti Fence." Across the street is a more old-fashioned, large poster with the kinds of creatures meant to be contained. Oh sorry, that's an ad for a Kiss concert. ... I spent some time last week trying to convince a friend that the gambling capital's name is not a tribute to a certain dietary preference. "It's Las Vegas, not Las Vegans," I said. ... Lockheed says fusion reactors small enough to fit in the back of a truck will be available in a decade. And you thought you were worried now when the kids went joyriding in a vehicle. ... Life has not been kind to children of VP candidates this year. Earlier, it was a drunken Bristol Palin at a family brawl. This week, it was revealed the VP Joe Biden's son, Hunter, has been kicked out of the Navy for allegedly testing positive for cocaine. Hmm, maybe we could pair the two offspring in a debate about the virtues of their drug of choice. ... No matter how quick it is, the hassle of modern airplane travel remains. For example, there's the ritual disrobing at security. Oh, I was just supposed to remove just my belt, jacket and shoes? Sorry.

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