Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 55 seconds


You know what I always say, it’s as easy as shooting horses in a barrel, or leading a fish to water. … Ah it’s spring, the flowers and the virus are in the air.

  I was just reading “Coronavirus for Dummies” Actually, they don’t need a book—just show a picture of Spring break beaches in Florida and pictures of opening day at the Texas Rangers stadium on April 5. Surprisingly, the opener was not scheduled for the more appropriate date, April 1. … I am finishing my new book, “Great Moments in Oil Tanker. History”. It opens with the Exxon Valdez and closes with the Ever Given in the Suez Canal. The latter’s blockage of the important waterway had a simple explanation---the captain tried to parallel park and it went wrong. We’ve all been there. … U.S. Rep. Matt Gaetz from Florida is under investigation for allegedly  having a commercial relationship with an underage girl. Gaetz is emerging as an early favorite for the “Jeffrey Epstein Memorial Award”. The real question whether he offered her the “Bill Clinton Scholarship” for congressional interns. Now, there are reports Gaetz liked to show his, uh well, vacation photos to other representatives. Gaetz has denied all the allegations. He says just is very friendly with young women.  … I have always insisted that in the chorale number “All We Like Sheep” from the Handel oratorio “Messiah”, the word “like” is a verb, not a preposition.” …  QA Non enthusiast U.S. Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene is starring in the lead role in a remake of the musical “Annie, Get Your Gun”. However, the most famous song from the show has been rewritten for her to declare “You Can Get A Man with a Gun and I Have a Constitutional Right to Do So”.  … It’s been well publicized that 15 million doses of Johnson and  Johnson anti-coronavirus vaccine were ruined by the plant producing the medicine when they mixed the J&J product with a similar vaccine from Astro-Zeneca, News reports have obtained secret recordings of arguments by managers at the factor  about who was to blame. They are heard saying  “You got Peanut butter I my chocolate. You got chocolate in my peanut butter”.

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