Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 21 seconds


I think instructions on the 5-pack of masks being sold at 7-11 were not written by a native English speaker. The first step in  the instructions of how to wear them is “Crap one pcs.” That’s doesn’t sound sanitary to me.

… Brett Farve has agreed to return $1.1 million he was paid by the Mississippi welfare department that he was paid for speaking engagements at  which he did not appear. I don’t know if this will end chances for an over/under a plea deal. Actually, investigators missed the fact he actually attended many of them and nobody noticed, demonstrating the high degree of skill he acquired in football in executing fakes. … The Trix Rabbit was starting to show his age. So leaders at General Mills decided they need something to sharpen his mind. It was recommended that he receive training involving his skills of perception. So the Rabbit was taken to a  training school for young dogs. His task was to look at pictures of the dogs and he would be told their names. After 10 minutes, he was shown the pictures again and asked to Identify each mutt. Try as he could, no matter how many times he practiced, he could not remember the names of the individual canines. It just goes to show: You can’t teach an old Trix new dogs.  … I was surprised to learn that so many New Yorker fans of the world’s most famous cellist. You can hear that in the kids expression when they come home and yell, “Yo, Ma.”

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