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Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts (697)

RANDOM THOUGHTS; BRADY AND GISELLE

GiselleFollowing the Patriots loss to the Giants in the Super Bowl, Giselle, the model who is the wife of New England Quarterback Tom Brady cursed the losing team's receiving corps. Brady was upset. He told her she was a bad girl—a very bad girl—and deserved a spanking. … A friend who had not watched the reality TV series asked me "What is the deadliest catch?" Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: TRUMP’S CEMETERY PLOT

Donald TrumpIt was reported this week that Donald Trump has purchased a cemetery plot near a golf course in New Jersey. Actually, it was two plots: one for Donald and one for his hair. He dropped his original plan for a pyramid and for burying his servants and his possessions with him because he apparently couldn't find a practical way to bury his casinos.

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RANDOM THOUGHTS: GINGRICH AND THE MOON

Newt GingrichGOP presidential candidate Newt Gingrich has been defending his call for a colony on the moon by 2020. But I think he was just practicing to star in an episode of “The Honeymooners”: “To the moon, Alice. To the moon …”

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RANDOM THOUGHTS: TEENAGE DRIVERS

Following a minor traffic accident this week, I was feeling a lot like the Green Bay Packers after the playoff game with the Giants last weekend: All beat up and no place to go. The worst damage was to a black toilet that had been left at the side of the street for pickup. That poor toilet didn’t stand a chance. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: EURO BLUES

euro symbolA new line is being sung to the “Hokey Pokey” in tribute to financial problems in Europe: “You take the euro up you take the euro down. You take the euro up and you shake it all around.” … The television was just blaring an advertisement for “The Starving Artists Sale”. Read more...

A DEAD MOUSE

Pepsi has denied a man's claim he found parts of a dead mouse in his bottle of Mountain Dew. The company maintains the mouse would have been dissolved by the liquid. I guess there is some truth to the rumor that the original name proposed for the product was "Mouse Away". There was also a report that Roach Motels would now have fountain service of Mountain Dew and Pepsi guaranteeing that "Roaches check in but they don't check out." Read more...

RUNNING THE TOYOTATHON

I think my car was in the Toyotathon. I drove it 26 miles 385 yards and it died. … The name of the company, Unit4, has always confused me. It sounds like the office next to the Men in Black bunker near the tunnel. “MIB can’t handle the alien invasion. It’s time to call Unit4.”  Or maybe Unit4 was the ward housing Jack Nicholson’s character in “One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest.”

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RANDOM THOUGHTS: PHIL SPECTOR

Love the advertisements for the Phil Spector Christmas album that are on radio right now. Spector is serving 19 years to life for murder. So of course, the latest version of his legendary work will include “I Fought the Law and the Law Won” and a special holiday rendition of “Folsom Prison Blues” and “I didn’t shoot the sheriff, the deputy or that broad."

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RANDOM THOUGHTS; SAVING THE EURO

euro logoThe European Union has come up with another idea to save its beleaguered currency - "Let’s put on a show and save the euro". .... Today’s multiple choice quiz: The stock market A. Reacted positively to the latest attempt to save the euro. B. Reacted negatively to the latest attempt to save the euro. C. Decided to put its money on Billy Crystal to save the euro and the Oscars Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: CHRISTMAS SPECIALS

Christmas specials start to dominate the television lineup. In a holiday version of “Flashpoint” the team faces a hostage situation in which a deranged elf holds the reindeer at gunpoint. And “Criminal Minds” pays special tribute to the season with “Who is Killing Santa’s Elves?” Read more...

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